Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, and love has also made a home in many workplaces. For many, having a partner who works in the same place as you sounds like a dream come true.
However, workplace relationships also come with certain challenges that one should be aware of. From the job roles of the two partners at work to their behaviour in the office, each factor needs to be balanced, maintaining personal and professional boundaries in mind.
While most workplaces in India are slowly becoming more open to relationships among company members, this comes on the back of transparency and decorum that bind the company, its employees, and HR together.
Why Workplace Romance Isn’t Just a “Personal Matter”
No matter how much one may want it to be so, workplace romance rarely stays a “personal matter.” When two colleagues enter a personal relationship, even the most open-minded find themselves reevaluating their perceptions of the people involved.
Often, when not handled carefully, workplace romances can shift power dynamics within a team when both romantic partners are part of it. Should one partner hold a more senior role, the perception of favouritism also becomes hard to beat.
If a relationship does not work out, it can often affect the professional dynamics of the involved individuals. This, in turn, can impact the atmosphere within the team/company and severely affect even those who work closely with the former partners.
When handled carefully, a workplace romance can still change certain aspects of the workplace, but in a positive way. After all, love and companionship should indeed be a cause for celebration.
The Boundaries to Be Maintained
The very first thing to do, even before entering a workplace romance, is to go through the company’s policy on the same. Many companies in India do not allow spouses or even romantic partners to be a part of the same company.
If your company has a strict no-romance-in-the-workplace policy in place, it might be time to step back and rethink what you want to do. Discuss possible next steps with your partner or prospective partner.
Even when a company allows workplace romances, it still has a relationship disclosure mandate in place. While it may seem unfair to some, sharing information about one’s relationship with the company might be a bad idea if done through a natural, confidential process.
Many companies mandate that their employees disclose any workplace romances, especially when the individuals involved are on the same team or in a reporting line. Most often, non-disclosure becomes important when a conflict-of-interest might seem feasible.
With HR and leadership in the loop, the partners in question can rest easy about their relationship and gain a better understanding of the kind of behaviour to be expected under the changed circumstances.
Depending on the roles of the different individuals, HR and leadership might insist on a role or team change to avoid any unequal workplace dynamics. The transparency policy in place also helps in case the relationship does not work out.
Reminders for HR and Their Policies
When it comes to workplace romances, HR plays a crucial and sensitive role in ensuring that personal matters do not affect professional dynamics. One of the biggest requirements is maintaining a neutral and open-minded attitude.
No matter your personal opinions, HR must not impose them on others or influence their decisions. The focus should be on how to keep the change in personal dynamics between the two separate from any professional operations.
A concise, clear policy on workplace romances should always be in place to avoid potential conflicts. Citing possible awkwardness or cultural norms to have an unclear or absent policy can ultimately lead to bigger issues.
HR should also ensure that the company’s POSH policy addresses consensual relationships. While consensual relationships still should not allow individuals involved to engage in unwanted advances, they cannot be treated with the same lens as an incident involving two unattached individuals.
Be sure to emphasise that disclosing a romantic relationship to HR does not mean it must be shared with everyone. Depending on the preferences of the involved employees, the information should first be conveyed only to those who will be directly impacted by the change or who need to know for compliance purposes.
HR’s Role: From Firefighting to Prevention
More than anything, HR also plays a role in ensuring that any workplace romance remains healthy, without damaging existing workflows. Similarly, HR also has the responsibility to address, in case of existing unequal workplace power dynamics, that the involved parties are completely consenting, with their job roles playing no role in the nature of their personal connection.
Make sure to create psychologically safe reporting channels that help individuals share their distress when they notice growing discomfort, whether in their own relationship or in someone else’s.
Educate employees, those in a relationship and those not in one, that boundaries are important, no matter how personal dynamics shift. Emphasise that no one should pressure others to disclose their personal matters if they are not willing, even if their partner is in the same workplace.
How Indian Workplaces Complicate the Conversation
Within India, where romantic relationships have always been discussed in hushed whispers, policies and expectations surrounding them can conflict with cultural norms.
Furthermore, due to inherent gender biases, female professionals involved in workplace romances often end up facing far more scrutiny compared to male professionals. This can lead to unequal consequences for two partners in the same relationship.
Another aspect to consider is the type of workplace one is part of. Within traditional organisations, where conversations are often formal, it can be far easier to keep them focused on work.
On the other hand, while an “open” environment in a startup may make discussing a workplace romance more comfortable, it can also affect broader workplace conversations and dynamics.
What a Balanced Workplace Romance Policy Looks Like
When creating a workplace romance policy, keep in mind to:
- Protect autonomy without enabling abuse of power
- Have clear do’s and don’ts, written in plain language
- Train manager on early warning signs of budding workplace relationships
- Align the POSH, ethics, and grievance frameworks for effective
The policies in place should combine individual preferences, professional expectations, and regulatory compliance to create paths that work for all. While certain flexibility should be provided, the following should be treated with zero tolerance:
- Post-breakup retaliations in the workplace
- Involving the company name in any retaliatory public remarks
- Excessive public display of affection
- Letting personal relationships influence work decisions.
In the End…
Workplace romances do not require extra eyes or micromanagement. However, they do come with risks that should be acknowledged. With clear policies and an emphasis on open-minded professionalism, companies can create a workplace environment where workplace romances can not only thrive but also add to the positivity.
Ignoring boundaries in workplace relationships can lead to negative consequences that are certainly far worse than any discomfort one might feel in discussing the details of workplace romance with the necessary individuals.
With clarity, consistency, and courage, professionalism in any workplace can easily survive personal choices. Even if a relationship goes south, it need not affect your work or your professional success.
